How Big?

As I cracked open my latest book, Crazy Love by Francis Chan, I knew from the moment I began, this guy has "IT". He has captured in his mind to a much greater extent than I, just how BIG this God of ours is. He comes not from the world of ease and dragging with him this sense of "all is well and the big guy has my back", but from loss. He has lost just about every adult figure in a young mans life, tragically, horribly, and yet he gets "IT". He has been "given" the ability to see what is before him. I am only into the book a short way, but so far I can see where I have gotten complacent. Maybe comfortable is a better description. My eyes are open, but I don't see. I miss the miracles that surround me. I spend more time focusing on what is not like I think it should be , and in my narrow minded focus of those wrongs ( so I perceive) I miss the glory that is about me , as if its too small to be worthy of my notice. This I will change! One of my conclusions thus far , is that he first had the desire to see. He was "open" for this experience, and ready for growth. he was ready to see what God had for him. I have pictured in my mind a picture of Francis sitting at a bus stop with lunch pail in tow, eyes wide open and dressed with eagerness to jump in the bus, like a child of to his first day of kindergarten. Ready, excited, and longing to embrace what lies ahead. Full of anticipation. Unlike myself, that has the attitude of "been there done that". I choose not to live each day full of expectation, excitement, and eagerness to see "what is God going to do today?!" Don't get me wrong. I have those moments, and sometimes a entire day, but look what I am missing by not making the choice to live this was daily. Look at all the other days I drag myself through, thinking to myself silently "when will this be over?". Thank you Francis for the kick in the pants. Today will be different for me. well at least that's a start, right? I will be open, excited, and eager to see what God will do today, and tomorrow, and the next day..and when I feel myself falling back into the pit of apathy ( oh, and I will )I pray that my inner voice will whisper..."what about that's huge God that has a love so crazy for you-don't miss this Kathy".